leave close

    

stumble on my footprint
hide behind my shadow
feast on where my brilliance stops
treat me like your first draft
your only draft

never take a second shot

never leave me dried up

can't stand the thought to look up 

and realize i'm not uptop

no longer calling all the shots

she loves me. you're not supposed to cope with that.

being in your seat, i wouldn't care to live with that

bleh. what the hell.

i lose my words and i lose my dreams,
everything that i "fought" for is breaking at the seams.
i've never really fought for, mostly thought about
i tell myself i don't care that they fade
but really i worry 'bout living in shame
for not fighting 'til my dreams are made
and still i walk around thinking what if.


what if motivation was more than just a footprint

      

there's something inside you

     

     

i just wanna kiss you, baby, i just wanna hug you

i've never even, expressed myself to the people whom i relate.
i've never even, dreamt of stayin' in the same place.
i dream of leavin, i dream of cheatin'
bend the truth, is that really so wrong to do
from embraces and words, to just relations and slurs.
they're waiting, i'm sure. still hangin' at my door.
i wonder, instead of leaving it ajar, it's time to close it for sure.

they say, he's livin' in past tence, dreaming of memories, remembers realities, that are long since gone.
but you'll say, should i be your past tence, should i be your memories, your distant realities, for i will be long since gone.

but i'd never let it go that far. 

i like my dreams the way they are. 

frozen bananas in a broken sky

       

if you don't know by now, you should probably listen to the song while reading.

why it is that the first thing leads to the next, i don't know. but what i do know is that the question in itself doesn't makes sense. and neither do i. 

it doesn't make sense, questioning the obvious.

so. still stockholm. still love. still i'm convinced that the sudden increase of nightmares is a direct counter to the heaven that i have recently come to know as reality.

still, i can't help but write in this sort of nostalgic, somehow dark way. i'm aware of it. but i really can't help but love it as much as my next. this is where i excel. where i'm the best me i can be.

the rain makes me a winner. the rain puts me on top.

it may drag others down, but i stand tall, there is no cost.

let's bring a toast, let's have darkness, our host, keep us as the light source.

let us do what we never do, or, keep summer going until we're through.

let me shine a light.

       

i'm new here.

    

no rhyme, but i will, however, share some words i found cluttered on a wall in a bar cleverly named "angkor what?" in siem reap, cambodia.

when do you say it?

when the threshold of your lips cannot withstand the momentum of the expression

i'm home. well, as home as you can be when you find yourself in a new city since a couple of days.

but i'm getting there.

for now, let's settle with saying that i'm in stockholm. a beautiful city, full of possibilities, and i love it here already. i'm spending my days with the girl in the picture above. lovely girl in a lovely frame*. and coming home from a lovely trip, that's just the lovely way i like it. love it. lovely.

i'm planning to write about my trip to asia, but i wouldn't cross my fingers. knowing me, either it would be a rhyme or some other ridiculously mysterious way of writing, immediately eliminating all chances of being able to get my point across to most of you, the reader. i'll try. we'll see.

i am, however, working on a project. more about that later.

*the frame would be both her and the picture.

i know about my dreams.

but still, somehow, not about my dreaming.

throw some dreams around

     1

i'm just sayin' you won't do better

tell me have you heard that lately

i guess not, 'cause your friends all hate me

i'm not narcissistic, i just don't think you see

that i'd care enough for you to be indifferent

i'll share enough for you to be magnificent

you may not be the greatest but you're good enough for me

but who is really, it's just a word you use to justify

that there's nothing better but who really knows

i just know that i can settle with someone who really shows

that she feel the same, don't think i'm the greatest but she's not to blame

just a realist, just a logical extremist, 

just a girl, that considers me her man when it comes to this

     2

i'm just sayin' you won't do better

tell me have you heard that lately

i guess not, 'cause your friends all hate me

i'm not narcissistic, please don't straight up leave

'cause i'd treat you right, though i won't be a pushover

will stand up for my cause when push comes to shove

would set my foot down in anticipation for some love-

making, initiation is what i have on my playlist and

you know when we get down we get down for the real thing

don't mess around, it's as amazing as before innit

     3

i'm just sayin' you won't do better

tell me have you heard that lately

i guess not, 'cause your friends all hate me

i'm not narcissistic i just don't want for you to be without me

     4

i'm just sayin' you won't do better

tell me have you heard that lately

i guess not, 'cause your friends all hate me

i'm not narcissistic i just don't want for you to be without me

me to be without you. sorry i got carried away, i always bring up sex

when i want you to come out and play, when i want you to just straight up say

that you love me, that you want me. please, don't go on without me.

home is where you heart is

     

xin chao, she said, as if everything was unique

to keep you is no gain
but still it keeps me sane
to lose you is no loss,
'cept from letting go of all that stupid shit i aint,
or don't want to be; it's probably nothing and you probably love it, but i can't help but think that they see
my heart aims for trouble
my mind makes it double
the killing fields dont help my self-centering go subtle
haven't i got all i want, need,

and all the pussy i can eat,


latter's not what i aim for but still that shit sure keeps them wet,
and me fed,
makes my lower part red
and my face
thinkin of yesterday
and you,

sorry to keep you waiting but i still dont know.

turning the world upside down but still i tell myself that i've not -

- love

    








solen går ner. jag sitter nästan på stranden. armen är täckt med armband (inte riktigt täckt, men ändå väldigt många (inte så många, men nog är de stora alltid)). ett har sandvita stenar och olivgrona roskulor. favoriten. det är så vackert här. i den här delen av världen. så fruktansvärt. varmt. gahwd. jag förstår inte allt riktigt än.

ändå kan jag känna ett visst sug efter att faktiskt vara hemma i lagom kalla sverige. att få klä upp mig och känna mig fin. att kunna unna mig (här unnar man sig allt, så lyx är vardag). väldigt gärna vill jag kasta de konstanta svettningarna (sa jag att det är varmt här?). men det finns det tid for. senare.

men gud, så vackert det är. här. livet. mitt liv. nu. så mycket jag har haft nöjet att se, nöjet att uppleva. ni kommer få höra allting. senare. inte snart. jag har ju faktiskt ett par
månader kvar.

       

goodwyn, it's better than you'd ever imagine

     

     






















Anthony Gonzales will lure you in; to a new world, a new experience, over and over. It's intruiging, to say the least. And with every new release he somehow manages to reinvent himself; from the concious and hectic modernism of 'Before the Dawn Heals Us' to the ghastly, dreamy pop-production that is 'Saturdays = Youth', M83 has yet again found a way to enchant us in a new setting, even more epic than the former productions. He has done it again.

After the first minute into the intro of M83's latest production 'Hurry Up, We're Dreaming' I was hooked. And I'm quite confident you will be too. The boiling build-up and the mesmerizing increase in tension just makes it impossible not be at least a little bit curious to where the rest of the album will take you, and yeah, quite the journey it certainly is. I'd consider 'Hurry Up, We're Dreaming', to be a step back to his roots, in contrast to his previous album 'Saturdays = Youth', containing that "soundtrack"-ish feel, though it still has the epic pop-tracks (which was what essentially pushed him into fame four years ago) in 'Midnight City', 'Claudia Lewis' and 'Steve McQueen'. While the songs that wouldn't be considered as "hit singles" work as more of a transfer between those that do, they're certainly distances you wouldn't want to skip (i.e. the incredibly subtle but enchanting track 'Train to Pluton'. It's a story, an incredibly well tied-together story. There aren't many artists that manage to create such consisting albums as M83, and that essentially is what makes this the second greatest album of 2011. The consistency of quality is absolutely astonishing. Someone needs to make a movie to go with this album, maybe like Kanye West did with the short movie 'Runaway' for his latest solo release 'My Beautiful Dark Twisted Fantasy'.

the second greatest album of 2011 is 

M83 - Hurry Up, We're Dreaming

below you will find the four categories i had to add:

The last thing to leave a man is hope, therefore: New album by The Postal Service
       

i will never stop hoping for a new release by the postal service. ever since releasing their first album in 2003, the duo (jenny lewis should also be mentioned here) of ben gibbard (death cab for cutie), jimmy tamborello (dntel) has constantly been hinting at another release, without results. at this moment, the possibility of a follow up to 'give up', which i'd consider to be one of, if not the best pop albums of all time, seems to be non-existent. but... maybe?

If it does, nostalgia will never disappoint (right!?), therefore: New album by The Shins
       

and here we have it, in march the shins will finally follow their 2007 album 'wincing the night away', after james mercer taking some time off with his and dangermouse's side-project 'broken bells'. having heard some tid-bits from the new album, i have a good feeling. and for me, the shins don't have to be excellent, they just have to be the shins. if they are, they will be good, and i will be happy.  'cause if they are, nostalgia will take the wheel. 

But neither will excellence, therefore: New "solo" album by Kanye West
       

let's face it; whatever you might think of kanye west, i know i hated him, his 2010 release is a fantastic album. he himself is nothing short of a great producer, say what you will about his rap, and with 'my beautiful dark twisted fantasy' kanye is essentially staging his own award show, an absolutely action-packed rollercoaster of starpower and emotion. i have no idea of where the future will lead, but we may find out soon. besides getting an eventual solo album, we have the follow up to 'watch the throne' as well as a 'g.o.o.d. music' compilation hitting the surface of the earth this year.

However, blown up shit will, therefore: Beyoncé - '1+1'
       

hands down, the most overrated song of this year. of a very long time. this is just bad, i remember a certain veiron flux playing this to me when it first hit the internet, and we could both instantly agree on that the hilarious raise in pitch at 'YOU' is nothing but ridiculous. and what's the deal with her not knowing much about 'algebah'? she's one of the most famous female artists on the planet, and nowhere along the line someone told here that, "bitch, it's algebra!". i love me some beyoncé, but this is crap. listen to 'i miss you' instead. (and also 'why don't you love me' since noone seems to have heard that one.)

bring the drugs, baby, i can bring my pain

     

Abel Tesfaye, more commonly known as The Weeknd, has had quite a year, but my guess is that this has been nothing compared to the possibilites and expectations of coming year. This past spring, Abel committed to releasing, not only one, but three albums for free over the span of 2011, titled 'House of Balloons', 'Thursday' and 'Echoes of Silence' in chronological order.  All of the three mixtapes has been self-released, and every release has exceeded the former in terms of "buzz/hype", especially with 'Thursday' featuring the track 'The Zone', that included a guest appearance by Drake, who has played an important role in getting The Weeknd out in the public. To have been able to tour at all with a schedule like this, along with being starred in Drake's new album, 'Take Care', remixing tracks for Lady Gaga and Florence and the Machine, is a performance in itself. 

The first album of the three, 'House of Balloons', came out of nowhere, and exploded out in the public soon after release. It contains an overpoweringly fresh take on what has come to be the r'n'b genre, and manages to captivate the listener in an atmosphere of describing depression and over-indulgence, and the incredibly lush and nocturnal feel can only be likened to that of what the 'the xx' did to the pop genre two years ago. The nine songs featured in the release manages to be both beautiful and enthralling, while at the same time being deeply disturbing and unsafe. This is an incredibly close-to-heart production, no doubt about it, and what's even more clear; someone hurt mah bro'. bad.

the third greatest album of 2011 is 

The Weeknd - House of Balloons

best track - 'the party & the after party'

below you will find the five greatest mashups of this year, in a particular order:

Daft Punk x Ellie Goulding - 'Something About Us Under The Sheets'

       

and here it is, ladies and gentlemen, the mashup of the year. words can't describe my love for this. the groovy, sexy blend of ellie goulding's voice and daft punk's seducing composition just gets me going. listening to this gave me a huge crush on ellie, and man, there's a massive amount of great mashups/remixes on her stuff if you'd be interested; but this is the best. the tip of the iceberg. instant classic.

Star Slinger x Whitney Houston - 'How Will I Copulate'

       

i recently discovered star slinger, aka darren williams, and his album from last year, volume one; a fantastic little work of art, with a refreshingly overpowering warm and innocent layer on every single sound he uses. when browsing his soundcloud, i discovered what apparently is a fan mashup between his track 'copulate' and 'how will i know' by whitney houston, which makes for an inappropriately cute title. and a fantastic mashup. this will make you happy.

James Blake x Drake - 'Measure It All'

       

this is probably the most interesting and extensive mashup here, as it is actually an extract from a mixtape, cleverly named 'james drake' by bombé and mr carribean. this track is a mash between james' very subtle 'measurements' and drake's throwaway track 'do it all' (which i didn't like very much), and therefore i'd definitely see this as an improvement on both parts. though i still consider the former to be a great song, drake's contribution adds another interesting dimension and quite frankly this mashup reminds me a lot more of james blake than the original. cool. cool, cool, cool.

M83 x Kanye West - 'Midnight Life'

       

next up is a mashup of m83's (hint: there'll be more of  him later on in my 2011 wrap-up) hit single 'midnight life' (you should absolutely check out the remixes for this track, which was also named pitchfork's 'track of the year') and kanye's 'good life'. excellent build up, and kanye's lyrics are a nice addition that breathes new life into the song. this is the absolute basics of the mashup formula, with excellent execution, add something recognizable to something fantastic. bam.

Little Dragon x Kelly Rowland - 'Union Motivation'

       

i've had little dragon on my 'yet to listen to'-list after i first heard her excellent collab with producer sbtrkt, and when i recently found this little gem i atleast got a small taste. though i have to admit, i hadn't initially heard either of these songs before, but i was instantly impressed by the excellent timing and the flow it brings. it's a great track, and after listening to both originals, i definitely prefer this version.